Sunday, January 27, 2013

The Faith of a Child

     Tonight we observed the Lord's Supper at church.  As the bread and juice were being passed, I was quietly explaining to my sons that they stood for Jesus' body and His blood that He shed for us.  I just happened to be holding my youngest son in my arms and my thoughts drifted to the fact that this son that I held was given to me by God.  If someone were to ask me, "How do you personally know that God exists and that He is good?"  I could point to my second son and daughter.  As I held him and thought of the bond that we have, nothing can explain it except that it is from God.  You see, I did not birth my son.  Actually I did not even meet him or know that he existed until he was almost three years old.  But our God is amazing. And when I hold my son, I have no doubt that God has entrusted this amazing little person to me to love and raise in equal amounts to the children that I bore.  I love him so much.  And the fact that I could possibly love him that much proves to me that my God is real and that my God is good.
     On the flip side of that, as I was explaining to them about the symbolism of the bread and juice, I commented that Jesus died on the cross for each of us, because He loves us.  It was immediately apparent that my six year old couldn't completely grasp that concept yet, but for my five year old, it was different.  I wasn't telling him anything that he didn't already know.  There was no doubt in his mind that Jesus loves him and that God is good.  I have heard many times that a person grows closest to God during trials and times of need.  I know that when I am going through trying times of my own, that is usually when I can feel God's presence the most.  Undoubtedly there have been times in his life already that he has needed God and God has shown himself faithful.  Perhaps when he did not have an earthly father who would love and protect him, his Heavenly Father stepped in and filled the gap personally.  What I know for sure is that he knows that God exists because he has seen Him and His goodness in his own life.  If people were equipped with faith meters, his would shoot out the top!  I don't even know how to explain his faith in words; I just know that his faith and his understanding of God's love is beyond his years. 
     And as for my six year old, I trust that the time will come when he will understand how much God loves him, as well.  For now, he is still safely nestled inside the bubble of love and protection that we, his parents, have provided since birth.  He has yet to see or experience the uglies of the fallen world that we live in.  But I trust that when the time comes that He needs God's love and protection first-hand, He will also find our God faithful and good.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Time Sharing

     I have a great aunt who is 93 years old.  She has lived a long, full, happy life.  She was married to a wonderful Christian man for over 50 years.  They truly were two halves of one whole.  They loved each other and took care of each other up until he passed away ten years ago.  They had only one daughter who was their pride and joy.  Then they had three granddaughters who also became their pride and joy.  Even though they lived in separate states, they were completely involved with everything their granddaughters did.
     Not only was her family important to her, but they were always very involved in their church and community....everyone spoke well of them.
     Now she no longer lives in the town that she called home for so long....the house the she and her husband built together had to be sold.  Hardly anything is left of them in the town that they once swelled in.  Now, at 93, almost everyone that she knows has passed on.  She is alone.  She lives in the neighboring state close to her daughter now, who checks on her often.
     She is 93.  She says that she prays everyday that God would take her home.  She knows that her life has been blessed.  She has more to live for on the other side now than on this side.  She is ready.  But still God holds her here. 
     It makes me wonder why God does the things that He does.  I think of the young child who passed away after choking on an every day food.  I think of the teenager that passed away in a car accident.  I think of the mother who left behind two young children by falling through the attic.  Oh my, what those families wouldn't give for one more day with their loved ones.  Why does God allow some, who so desperately want to go, stay behind and instead take some that were not done living?  It seems unfair.  Each day that we are given on earth is so precious.  I do not blame my aunt for other deaths.  Or accuse her of stealing their time.  She has no just makes me wonder.
     I have no doubt that if given the chance, my aunt would gladly deposit some of her time into someone else's account.  She is tired.  She is a Christian who knows that death is not the end, only the beginning.  The truth is that no one has control over the time of our matter how much we exercise, eat healthy, don't smoke, etc.  Indeed, the way that God decides how long our time will be is a mystery to me.  So, I guess I shouldn't wonder and I shouldn't second guess.  And I certainly am glad that my aunt has been blessed with a long life.  I just think that when I get to heaven, I might pass on my "time sharing" idea to the Big Man (that is......whenever my time comes).

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Dear Journal

Dear Journal,
As I read back over entries from my childhood journal, I realized that I still feel like that same person.  I can remember thinking back then that me at thirty would be some foreign stranger, an adult with little in common with the child. 
I wonder if twenty years from now I will look back on these entries and feel the same way.  I wonder if I will still feel like the same person as I am now, only see more wrinkles when I look in the mirror!  :)  I love you, 50 year old, Ellen.  Don't get depressed and feel "old."  Live life to the fullest---think of Lisa Brewer.  You are only as old as you feel and act--young will shine through your eyes and smile.  Being happy--that comes from a walk with God.  I hope and pray that life don't beat me down. 
I have experienced some heartache in life the past twenty years and have not allowed it to define who I am.  I pray that whatever the next twenty years holds, I will be able to see my life through God's eyes.  BE BEAUTIFUL--inside and out.